It must be true, right? There are those out there who might have experience lost even worse than me. I wonder if that had happened to Haji--… No. Yuki. He cried a little last night; I’m so sure about it. Something bad must’ve happened in his life. But, how can he be like that? How can he be so lively? He’s weird… oh man, there I go again. I think about him again… He’s always in my head. Why? Maybe because I care about him, I think. Or is it…love? No, no. I don’t think so. Argh! Man! Get over this thought! Okay, go to class now!
Yuki might still be in the shower right now… maybe I should’ve asked him to go to class together with me. Well, too late for that anyway. I stop walking and look up at the sky. The sky is so blue this morning. I sigh. It’s very beautiful. What is this feeling inside of me? I feel very light… I feel free… I feel happy?...
I close my eyes and let the sun warm my face. What a beautiful morning. Suddenly, a face appeared in my head, it’s the face of Makoto-san, my ex-lover. I smile remembering him. I remember his gentleness, I remember his smile, and I remember his words when he said he loved me. Why is it that I feel happy at the thought of him today? Why am I smiling? I used to frown every time I think about him and I cried a lot for him.
Those memories should be painful… but, today, it’s different… I open my eyes quickly just at the thought of something which I have just realized. I’ve let go… It’s over… I… don’t love him anymore. I smile again happily. Those painful memories are no longer painful to me. I laugh at myself a bit. It brings me happiness. I mean, he used to love me but his love just doesn’t last forever. But, those times when he used to love me, I cherish it. Thanks, Makoto-san. I’ll move on now…
And then I walk to class happily for the first time… I thought of Yuki along the way to class. He is the only one I can open-up to. It’s still a wonder but, I felt rather relief to have him near…
***
“Nakatsu, what are you reading?” Yuki asked me during the recess time and sit on my table.
“Owh… just something about rabbit.” I said. Rabbits are beautiful… or so I think.
“Wow.. You’re an animal lover eh, Nakatsu?” He asked. “I thought you were reading porn or something. Hahahahaah!” Yuki teased me again.
I look at him in annoyance. “You’re annoying, you know?”
“I know.” He simply answers and laughs.
God! This guy! I sigh and just continue reading my book.
“Nakatsu…” Yuki calls.
“Yep…” I answer.
“Thanks for accepting me as your friend.” He said.
I feel really happy deep in my heart. “Thanks to you too.” I said.
Then, the bell rings and he went back to sit on his place. I look at him warmly. He smiles at me and I smile back.
***
I thought of asking Yuki to walk back with me when class is over but he seems preoccupied with all the boys and girls that are talking to him right now. So, I just walk back on my own. Yuki is rather popular, I notice. People like being around him. He surely is friendly anyway. So, I’m not his only friend, right? Now, what is this? Am I being jealous? It’s okay, I guess. I know him better though. He is my roommate.
Ouch! I bump into someone suddenly and he held me in his arms to avoid me from falling down to the ground. It’s Naba-senpai!
“There… There… what are you thinking about that you totally didn’t hear me calling you?” Naba-senpai asks, still holding me in his arms.
I quickly push him away. I hate it! “I’m sorry.” I said and quickly try to walk pass him but he block my way.
“Where are you going, my love?” He said teasing me. But, he’s rather tense today. I can sense it.
“Get away from me!” I yell. I hate his harassment! I don’t want anyone to touch me. I don’t want him to touch me.
“Okay. You’re being rather rude today, you know? Why? Is it because you already had someone?” He asked. His eyes… they are evil as they look into mine.
“What do you mean by that? I just can’t stand it that you’re always making fun of me!” I said angrily, justifying myself.
“I never made fun of you, Hasui-kun. I just… wanted you. Just one time… come on. One time... Do it with me just once and I’ll never get in your way again…” He said. He seems serious.
I’ve already guess this. He’s up for it. I won’t allow it! “No. Never!”
“Why? Is it because of that new boy?!” He asked something that made me even angrier. “I can see that you are responding well to him today. I hate competition, you know?! I’ve noticed you first. You are mine!” he said angrily.
“What the fuck?! I belong to no one!” I push him and wanted to run away but, Naba-senpai pull me to his arms and I can’t struggle to break free from him. I know that he is from Judo-club so he must be really strong. And I’m so skinny and weak. I can’t fight him. I might just become this beast’s meal for today. “Stop it, Naba-senpai! Let me go!” I yell.
He kisses my neck forcibly. I hate the touch of his lips on my skin! I hate it! “I like it when they struggle like this, you know? It made me become more aroused.” He whispers evilly to my ears.
“Help!!!” I scream and he slaps me down to the ground to shut me up. My lips bleed. It hurts. No. I can’t escape from him and no one is around to hear me. He then kicks my stomach and blood spurts out of my mouth. “Argh!” I scream. Fuck him! It hurts like hell! I swear he’s going to pay for this. But, what can I do? I don’t know what to do. I can’t fight him. I’m a weakling. He then picks me up and took me somewhere hidden. I’m too weak to even struggle now.
“I swear you’re going to scream real good out of this.” He said and then laughs evilly.
“Don’t. Please, Naba-senpai. You don’t want to do this.” I said weakly.
“Aw… You’re begging me now… how sweet. Perhaps you should beg me not to be too hard on you.” He said and laughs evilly again. “I’ve been waiting for this moment the whole time since I first noticed you.” He then bites my neck real hard.
“ARGHHHHHHH!!!!!!” I scream. The pain is too much. I think my neck is bleeding now.
“Shut up!” Naba-senpai said and slaps me hard again. He wipes the blood from his lips. It’s assured me that my neck is really bleeding.
“You sick!” I said and I sound a little off. It must be due to the pain.
He just laughs evilly at me. He rises up his hand to slap me again. “I said; Shut Up.” I closed my eyes because I knew that the slap is coming but, it didn’t come. When I open my eyes, Yuki is there. He is holding that strong hand of Naba-senpai to stop him from hurting me.
“Yuki…” I call him out. I felt really happy he is here. But, he looks otherwise. He looks very angry.
“I hate it when someone hurt another.” Yuki said calmly but sounding very serious indeed. “Especially when it’s the one I love.” He ends his last word with dragging Naba-senpai away from me and shoves him down to the ground. He did that with only his left hand.
Did he just say he love me? I might not hear quite right. Oh no… they are fighting now. Will Yuki be okay? Naba-senpai is the president of the Judo club. He is very fearsome. But, dear God… Yuki is such a strong guy… with such fighting skill… he blocks Naba’s fist with only one hand and throw a kick to him that sends him far away to the ground. That sure is painful for Naba. Well, he deserves it anyway. But, I know how strong Naba is. He just hit me back then. That was not even full strength but Yuki can block his attack easily and oh yeah… definitely he knew martial art as well, I think. But, his movement is so different from Naba. I’ve never seen it before. It’s not Judo, I guess. Wow! There he goes! Naba had fainted now. But, Yuki doesn’t seem satisfied. He still kicks his motionless body non-stop. Oh no. Is Naba fainted or is he dead?
“Stop it, Yuki!!!” I scream. It uses a lot of my strength though and now, I started to feel dizzy. I saw Yuki came running to me before my world goes black.
***
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